Sand, Sun, and a Whole Bucket of Madness
by Flono
Summary: Celestial Being finally gets a break after their long conflict intervention. They are set at the mercy of nature as they deal with all sorts of comical problems associated with seawater and awkward relationship moments. Enjoy...
1. Madness Upon Arrival

Celestial Being finally gets a break after their long conflict intervention. They are set at the mercy of nature as they deal with all sorts of comical problems associated with seawater and awkward relationship moments.

By the way...I don't own Gundam 00...but i was considering the model kit earlier...

Sand, Sun, and a Whole Bucket of Madness

Chapter 1

The weather was perfect. The sky was a clear sapphire blue with a scattering of clouds. The sun was out but not relentless. Seagulls glided through the air in search of their midday meal. Gentle waves rushed in from the great ocean expanse to come into contact with a perfect beach. The white sand lining the ocean looked as inviting as a soft leather couch. A little distance from the beach stood a rather large blue and white spacecraft...it was the Ptolemaios 2, mother ship of Celestial Being. With the fight against the mad gift fastener with a severe inferiority complex (Ribbons Almark) the crew of Celestial Being could finally take the break they deserved and relax, their first break in several years.

The hatch of the Ptolemaios 2 hissed open sending clouds of loose sand flying into the distance. Standing at the entrance of the hatch, some shielding their eyes was Setsuna, Allelujah, Lockon, a slightly irritated Tieria, a nervous Feldt, an ecstatic Mileina, Anew, Marie, Sumeragi, Billy, and even a very reluctant Graham.

"Waaaaaa! It's a beach!" screamed Mileina, "I've never been to one! Ooooo look at the water! It's so beautiful."

Without another word she raced down the ramp and towards the water. But before she could get very far she was snatched by a very calm and slightly emotionless Setsuna.

"Calm down Mileina. We're just looking for now." Said Setsuna.

"But…but…I want to swim!" whined Mileina.

Before Setsuna could come up with an answer Sumeragi Lee Noriega asked, "Mileina, how do you expect to swim without a proper swimsuit? We've been more or less cooped up in space for the last few years wearing uniforms. You want to swim in your skirt?"

Mileina, thoroughly embarrassed now, shook her head. "I guess I need a swimsuit first huh?"

"Yes you do! And this is an order! All of us will now go to the nearest city and buy some relaxation gear." Sumeragi grinned mischeviously…_this is going to be fun_.

Meanwhile while the girls started to plan out their vacation the guys stood around…rather useless and slightly bored.

"So what exactly are we supposed to do now?" asked Billy. He was slightly red because at the mention of the word swimsuit he had started to fantasize what Kujo (Sumeragi) would look like. Out of his jitterbug nerves and his attempt to hide the fact that he was fantasizing, he pushed his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose.

"I expect that we're going to have to accompany them…" sighed Lockon. The only person he truly looked forward to being with was Anew. It had been a sheer miracle that she didn't die when Setsuna shot her machine.

"C'mon Lockon, don't let them down." Allelujah smiled kindly. "I'm sure you're going to have fun." He suddenly reached out and grabbed both Setsuna and Tieria who just so happened to be attempting to inch away from the group to sneak back into the ship.

"And where do you think you're going? Huh? You want to ruin my fun?" Clearly it was Hallelujah that wanted to have fun…he grabbed the two and forced them into a headlock. "YOU. WILL. NOT. RUIN. THIS. DAY. OR. I. WILL. DISMEMBER. YOU." Thoroughly shaken Setsuna and Tieria had no choice but to obey the threats of the super soldier.

"Hey, Hallelujah, don't hurt them, if you want to have fun then you better leave them to their own devices. Allelujah ran away from the group whacking himself over the head and getting into a heated argument with his violent alter ego.

Setsuna was sulking…his moment of glory had been snatched away from him by Sumeragi. It was ironic that he actually cared. Normally he was indifferent to what was going on in the world. But for some reason he recently started to care. Maybe it was the fact that he realized that Feldt had feelings for him. _Sigh…what is with girls…they see the ocean and they get so excited… o well…it will all be worth it if I can see Feldt in a swimsuit…_

Tieria on the other hand was wondering about the meaning of his life. _What exactly am I supposed to do? I mean I can directly control Veda using my quantum brain waves. But there is nothing for me to supervise. I might as well just leave it on auto for a bit…then there is this beach thing. Everyone knows that I don't like to do these oddball bonding things…so why am I here?_

Gram was standing rather rigidly. Unfortunately for him he was suffering from intense anxiety. The only thought running through his mind was this: _Gundam…gundam…gundam…gundam…there's one in the hangar…must see Gundam…drool…_

Knowing what his best friend was thinking about Billy merely thought: _You need a girl my friend…_

It took the girls…or at least Sumeragi about an hour to strategically plan out the entire day. She had named the plan Operation Swimwear. The team would take two shuttles to the nearest city and go purchase the beach equipment. If all things went as planned in her outrageously detailed plan then the entire operation would take no more than 3 hours. But knowing the general stupidity of men and the indecisiveness of girls she knew for a fact that something would go horrendously wrong. But despite that knowledge she gave the guys one shuttle and the girls another. Sumeragi knew all of the different love interests that were brewing aboard her ship and planned accordingly. _This beach trip is going to bring an interesting turn of events for quite a few people…he he he he…_

To BE…CONTINUED!!!!

Notes:

Hi all! I'm back after a long streak of massive unproductivity, general angst and depression over my college situation, and a lack of creativity. This time I am trying my hand at a sort of Comedy Romance…though I have this feeling that I am overstepping my abilities with this one… But anyways this story is hopefully going to be reader inspired so I WANT to hear from you guys! ANYTHING will be greatly appreciated. I'm going to try and write a story based on what you guys want to read. The main pairings are going to be SxF, AlxMa and maybe some others if I can psychologically handle juggling that many stories. So yeah…READ and REVIEW! FLAMES are welcome as I am still a n00b fanfic writer and want as much input as possible. Thanks ahead of time.

P.S. I'll keep writing the things that come into my head for this fanfic, but if I get enough feedback then I'll certainly incorporate what I can into the story. Credit will be given. ^__^ Peace out guys and have fun reading.


	2. Shuttle Fun

O yeah…I forgot to mention that this is my first 00 fanfic…anyways on with the total OOC-ness that I have in my head.

Chapter 2: Madness in the Shuttles

Miss Sumeragi, in her semi-drunken frenzy, forcibly divided the guys from the girls. She messaged the numerous Haros on the Ptolemaios 2 to assist with the herding. Most of the guys were rather reluctant to get on board the shuttle as they had very little experience with both the real world and with shopping. The girls on the other hand, primarily Mileina, eagerly piled into the shuttle and took off towards the city.

The guy's shuttle had some other issues to deal with…primarily that Hallelujah wanted to pilot.

"Hey, hey! Let me pilot this damn thing! I can get us there in no time. Hell, we'll be back befo—"

*WhaBONK!!!*

Fearing for their lives (and getting a little revenge in the process) Setsuna and Tieria knocked Hallelujah out with a handheld fire extinguisher. The super soldier dropped to the floor like a puppet without strings.

Billy sighed and pushed his glasses up his nose. "That was really dangerous you two. What would you do if you killed him? Actually…you probably wouldn't be able to do much with Marie in a murderous rage… But anyways, strap him down, I'll fly.

Billy stepped over the unconscious body of Allelujah (Hallelujah had conveniently switched a split second before impact, of course nobody knew that). He strapped himself in the pilot's seat and adjusted the controls to match his preference. Within minutes the shuttle had taken off and like the sister ship raced towards the city.

Meanwhile…on the girl's shuttle….

You would think that the girl's shuttle wouldn't have nearly as many issues as the guy's shuttle…but they had their fair share as well. With numerous bouncing Haros in the cabin things were somewhat chaotic. The Haros were excited cause they had never had leave for any reason whatsoever. Their excitement caused problems as they bounced off walls and occasionally crashed into the girls. To make things worse, Miss Sumeragi was piloting the shuttle.

Normally she would have been a fine pilot…sober that is... This time the shuttle did uncomfortable tilts, twists, and dips as the slightly inebriated pilot struggled with the controls.

"Sorry girls…a little bit of *hic* turbulence…" slurred Sumeragi.

Despite her proximity to Miss Sumeragi for so many years, Feldt had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. "Don't you think we should get someone else to fly?" asked Feldt nervously.

Anew, who was clearly green in the face, replied slowly, "Probably…urgh…a good idea……. Does…anyone have a… baggie?"

Not a moment too soon, Mileina whipped out a large waterproof interior paper bag (God knows where she got that…). As Anew ungraciously regurgitated the remains of breakfast into the bag, the rest of the girls winced…all except for Marie…or rather Soma Peries.

Soma personally was not particularly looking forward to the vacation. She did not feel comfortable in casual clothes. She had spent most of her life in either an anesthetically clean lab or the military. She never had the occasion to dress in a two piece swimsuit. The closest thing to that would have to be the one piece leotard the scientists made her wear at the lab. She shivered. _Those perverted scientists. I wish I could kill them._

_Oh calm down Soma_, the voice of Marie floated through Soma's head, _I think you should just enjoy the day, if not I certainly will._

_I think I'll pass Marie._ Suddenly the shuttle dipped uncomfortably yet again "AAAARRRRGH!!!" screamed Soma causing everyone to jump. "Someone replace that drunk or we're all gonna end up dead and crispy!" She waited to see if anyone volunteered, and naturally no one did. "Fine, FINE, I'll do it then!" Soma unbuckled herself and marched into the pilot house. "MOVE! You drunk big breasted cow, I'm flying now!"

"Wha…no…im *hic* doooinn just *hic* fine." Sumeragi's eyes went out of focus. She fainted, the alcohol finally getting the best of her. Deep in the recesses of her immortal liver, the numerous molecules of alcohol sighed in relief, they too were saved.

Soma sighed explosively and, using one hand, grabbed Miss Sumeragi by the collar and threw her into the co pilot's chair. Sumeragi, having little to no coordination being unconscious simply landed in the chair and slid to the floor. She unconsciously assumed the fetal position.

Soma, in an instant, smoothed out the flight. She heard a collective sight from the cabin and fought hard not to smile. _You did a good thing Soma,_ said Marie in her head.

_I just didn't want you to die. I exist to protect you remember?_ thought Soma back at the girl in her mind.

_Sorry dear, that's not your job anymore. Its Allelujah's._ Marie giggled.

_You love sick little girl,_ griped Soma.

_I should call you that. Don't you have something for that Hallelujah personality of him?_ More mental giggling.

_Wha?_ "NO!" without realizing it Soma had screamed the "no" out. The sudden outburst woke Miss Sumeragi up.

"Wait…what's going on…I thought… did we die? Are w—" her words cut off as a strong pinch where the neck and the shoulder meet rendered her unconscious once again.

_Alright! VULCAN NECK PINCH!!!_ Cheered Marie.

Soma sighed, she was doing it a lot recently. She found life somewhat boring without a constant sense of danger and battle. Thus she left most of the hours in the day to Marie and only showed up on occasion. _It's gonna be one really REALLY long day…_

Back to the boy's shuttle…

The guy's shuttle…excuse me boy's shuttle was once again having issues. Setsuna had been reduced to fiddling with his completed Master Grade Exia in the corner of the cabin. Graham was fighting every one of his Gundam obsessing instincts not to join Setsuna. As a result he had forced Lockon and Tieria to lock him in the luggage compartment. Allelujah was still unconscious and Billy was still at the helm. Lockon pushed the hair out of his eyes and sighed. He glanced at Tieria and was about to ask him something but then noticed the glow in his eyes. Tieria was networked with Veda. Feeling neglected, Lockon pulled out his phone and called Claus and Shirin.

"Hey, it's Gene-1, I'm bored as hell out here… Wha? No! I'm not with Anew! How the hell do you expect me to be bored when I'm around her?... Anyways... do you want to get over to the beach and liven things up a bit?...Alright then! I'll see you later." Lockon hung up. Out of boredom and being deprived of Anew, Lockon had called in a favor from the boys in Kataron. They day was starting to look brighter.

Despite the fact that he was linked to Veda, Tieria was monitoring the entire conversation between Lockon and Kataron. He grinned mischeviously. The made Veda do a quick check on the girl's shuttle. No anomalies…that's good…Mileina's safe. Now, with that out of the way… VEDA!!! I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DU-DU-DU-DU-DU-DU-DU-DU-DUEL!!!

To be Continued…

Notes:

If none of you got the blatant reference to Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged…o well. Anyways things are just going to continue to spiral out of control from here on out. Naturally this means that if you guys want any ideas of your own incorporated, it will probably get tossed in somehow. So yeah, I'm gonna sleep now. It's 1:30 am and I gotta wake up early tomorrow (07/19) or rather today. So yup. READ REVIEW FLAME!!! Everything is welcome…

P.S. Please don't expect all of my updates to be this fast. I'm on a creativity spree currently. Oh yeah…some chapters might actually be short in comparison to this one. Meh, GO KIMCHEE FRIED RICE!!!


	3. Girl Bonding and Guy Stupidity

Chapter 3: A Little Insanity a Lot of Girl Bonding

With the entire cabin preoccupied with unconsciousness, an epic children's card game, day dreaming, adjusting models into poses, and the desperate search for a proper beach friendly mask. The cabin of the guy's shuttle became utterly and increasingly silent. The only sound to accompany the low hum of the shuttles engines was the shuffling that emanated from Graham's bag as he dug through his vast collection of masks and other facial attire.

"Argh, where is it? I know I left it somewhere near the Char Aznable mask." Graham grumbled as he continued to dig through his duffle bag. "AHA! Found it! Hey Billy, what do you think of this mask?"

Billy set the shuttle on autopilot just for a minute as he turned towards Graham. He nearly passed out from the sight. Graham was wearing an outrageously large pair of sunglasses with small plastic palm trees attached to the frames.

"Graham, I don't think it quite suits you. And what is it with you and masks anyways? I mean it's not like you need to hide your identity or anything. And the scar tissue that is on your face has smoothed out a lot. It just looks like…um Graham?"

Graham had retreated to a corner and began emanating a dark and depressing aura.

"Oh, dear god, I forgot you're sensitive about the scars." Said Billy with a swift facepalm. "Don't worry about them Graham, I'm sure some women find that the scarred look is rugged and handsome."

Graham, continued in his air of depression. Seeing how his best friend wouldn't recover from his bout of moping any time soon Billy returned to the cockpit and resumed flying the shuttle.

After a few awkward minutes, Graham's depression aura had permeated the corner. Setsuna simply couldn't stand it anymore.

"Okay Graham, if you're going to be that depressive, at least keep it to yourself. Here, you can fiddle with this MG Gundam 00 model kit I brought."

It was like someone had thrown a switch. Graham's depressive aura immediately vanished and was replaced by a dangerous air of obsession. Without a word, Graham had nearly tackled Setsuna and wrestled the box from his hands. As he opened the box an evil sort of grin showed up on his scarred face. It was then and there that Setsuna decided to leave Graham alone for the sake of preserving his life.

The Shuttle of Many Girls…

With Soma as the pilot the shuttle had become significantly more comfortable. Without the dips, twists, and turns associated with Miss Sumeragi's drunken piloting Anew, Feldt, and Mileina busied themselves with consulting the latest swimwear brochures and gossiping. Most of the talking was done by Mileina as her hyper burst mode had not yet run its full course.

"Oh-em-gee, didyouseethatreallyreallyreallycuteswimsuitbackonpageseventeen?" Mileina was speaking at a pace that normal humans would not be able to understand whatsoever. Anew being an Innovater was used to the hyper fast speak of one insane gift box fastener (Ribbons), thus she was able to pick up everything that Mileina said. Feldt on the other hand did not have the advantage of being an innovator. She was simply used to things happening at the speed of light. Luckily for Mileina, her two friends were perfectly capable of understanding even her fastest sentences.

"Hey, Mileina, calm down, you're getting a little squeaky…" said Anew, unfortunately her normally timid voice did not reach the ears of Mileina.

"Oh, andthenandthentherewasthatreallyscandelousswimsuitoveronpageseventy. Imeanwhattoboysthinkweare, abunchofbrainlessarmaccessories?" Mileina continued in this fashion for several more minutes. Eventually even she became exhausted and fell asleep.

In the lull of the conversation Feldt spoke. "Anew, I know that Lockon is all into you, so how is all that going and such? I mean there was that time that you shot Lasse, though technically it was that Ribbons, and then you proceeded to almost get killed by Setsuna. I have to think that put a kink in the relationship. Sorry if I'm being too blunt."

"Actually, I think that one event was a good thing for us, I mean sure it was as bad of a couple's fight as it can get, but it really ended up bringing us so much closer together. I've learned to cherish every moment of my life because of that. Life is short, and it can end suddenly. I figure I might as well live out every day to its fullest potential." Anew closed her eyes and smiled. She could still remember the time shortly after being rescued from the wreckage of the Gadessu (or is it Goddess).

Start flashback.

_The crew looked at her with wary eyes as if to say that they couldn't trust her even if she was to be locked up. Everyone was a little uncomfortable with her after that. They knew that at any time Ribbons could sneak into her mind and try and screw things up again. It brought Anew great relief when she saw the eyes of her lover Lockon. His eyes were not filled with wariness or even the slightest doubt. His eyes were filled with concern and love. He volunteered to take Anew to the holding cell until further notice. Before he opened the door he gave Anew a very very tight hug._

"_Don't you EVER do that again! What would I do without you? You are my life, my everything, the reason I continue to fight. If you leave the I would be forced to fight you, maybe even kill you."_

_Tears poured from his eyes as he tightened his hug as if to never let her go anywhere ever again._

"_I'm sorry Lockon, it was Ribbons, but that's still an excuse. It was partially me, as much as I knew you loved me I didn't know if you could ever fully love a monster like—"_

_She didn't get to finish her sentence as it was cut off by a prolonged kiss from Lockon. She kissed back, falling into the endless feelings of joy and happiness that only they could share._

_When he pulled away, Lockon said simply, "I don't love a monster. I love you Anew, all of you. You are just as human as I am and I will never stop loving you no matter what happens." He hugged her tightly again._

"_Thank you…" said Anew quietly as tears poured from her eyes. Her first love, and only love. He was hers forever and she was his. He was the one who accepted her and saw her for what she couldn't see herself, he was her purpose to live just as she was his._

End Flashback

"No, you're not being too blunt, Feldt. Actually, you're the first person other than Lockon who has actually talked to me about this. Thank you, you lifted the last of the doubts I had about myself." Anew smiled and was rewarded with a return smile from Feldt. "Let's go back to the catalogues."

With Mileina soundly asleep, Feldt and Anew scooted together and bounced swimsuit ideas off each other. It wasn't too long before Soma told them over the intercom that they had arrived and that she needed help waking Miss Sumeragi up.

Leaving the peaceful Mileina sleeping, Feldt and Anew walked into the pilot house and helped Soma drag Miss Sumeragi out into the cabin where they proceeded to use a very spicy very painful Insta-Sober mix to wake her up. Upon ingesting the painful tonic, Sumeragi shot up like a rocket.

"Haaaaaa haaaaaa haaaaaa, spicy, milk I need some milk." She was handed a glass of milk from the onboard refrigerator. "Whoooooo, much better. Or at least it would be if I didn't have this splitting headache. So we're here huh?...Well what are you girl's waiting for? Let's get out of here and do some shopping."

Feldt gently shook Mileina awake and then together the 5 girls left the shuttle and walked out into the light and towards the mall…

Meanwhile, the guy's shuttle had also landed. Allelujah was awake and with a headache that rivaled that of Miss Sumeragi. Billy was concerned about the kind of swimwear he should get to impress Kujo. Setsuna, with his limited experience with clothes instantly floated towards Tieria who had an expansive memory of fashions for both men and women. (Since the little cross dressing party, Tieria had been keeping up with the latest women's fashions. He had to admit though that such fashions were far from the teen fashions that Mileina was bound to dress in. He kept that part to himself. Lockon, having the most real world experience of all of the guys split off from the group and hurried into the mall. Allelujah, personally had no qualms about his swimwear. He figured that as long as he was comfortable then it would look good.

And thus the chronicles of shopping insanity began…

To Be Continued…EMWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Notes:

Whoooweeee. This is the most I have ever written in 3 days. I apologize beforehand saying that my next update may take a few days. You know, summer school and all. I was actually having trouble with this chapter and I actually ended up scrapping it 3 times before I finally got it to a point where I thought it would be a good read. Anyways RRF (Read, Review, Flame) I figure if I get a flame or two it will only improve my writing.

In response to Bamm:

Sorry, neither Veda nor Tieria manage a transformation (yet).

About the Setsuna fantasizing about Feldt: I figure since I want to make them more or less a primary pairing I took Setsuna out of his usual stoic self and added a bit of OOC craziness from my mind.

Oh and finally, thanks for the reminder to ask about reader input ^__^.

YES YOU HEARD ME!!! I want some input if you readers would be so kind to offer it (assuming you read down this far into the fanfic). Anyways, to satisfy the desires of readers I will be attempting to incorporate reader suggested micro-arcs into my fanfic if I can find a place to squeeze it in. So yeah, if you suggest something, it won't necessarily show up in the next chapter but it may if it fits my general storyline ^__^. Goodbye and good night all…or shall I say good morning as it is 2:38 am. God I have such bad sleeping habits.


	4. Troubles Upon Landing

Chapter 4: Troubles Upon Landing...

With the craziness of the shuttle deftly handled by Soma the girls headed out towards the mall. Or at least they would have gone immediately had Soma not latched herself to a chair and refused to go shopping.

"NO! I don't want to go buy a swimsuit! I don't have an occasion to wear one, nor do I WANT TO wear one!" screamed Soma as she used her super soldier strength to hold onto the chair's headrest.

Sumeragi and Mileina had other plans for the poor super soldier. Pulling on her standard yellow top Sumeragi said, "What could be the hurt of it, it's not like you have anything to hide right?"

_You know she has a point there_, chirped Marie from her mind.

Then Mileina threw in, "don't you want to look good for Haptism-san?"

_Hallelujah's gonna be there Soma._ Soma could see Marie grinning from inside her head. She really didn't want to buy or wear a swimsuit, and certainly not for the man who had killed so many of her comrades. Nevertheless, despite his actions in the past, she found some part of the hyper-violent alter-ego to be… attractive…

While she was occupied with her thoughts about Hallelujah, she let down her guard for a split second. In that split second Sumeragi and Mileina yanked the resisting girl off of the chair.

Soma, noticing how she was in mid air, resigned herself to the fate of swimsuit trying, buying,, and wearing. Marie, seeing the mental resignation took this chance to take back her body.

BAM! Marie slammed into the shuttle's floor.

"Owwwww…you didn't have to put so much force into that Miss Sumeragi, and you too Mileina." Tears formed at the corner of Maries eyes as she rubbed her tailbone.

"Marie? Is that you?" asked Sumeragi, "I thought Soma was the one in control."

Marie waved it off, "no that only happens when something she really likes happens. Normally I just let it happen but this time I want to go swimming and beach-funning so I have control."

"Well that's good," smiled Sumeragi.

"YAY alright-desu, let's go shopping!" Mileina in her nearly inexhaustible energy was almost vibrating with excitement as the girls walked towards the mall.

All Anew and Feldt thought as Marie picked herself up from the floor was, _Thank god I don't have a tomboyish alter ego._

Back with the guys…

The engines reduced their howling to a diminished high pitch whine as they cooled down and prepared for shutdown. The hatch hissed open and who was standing at the opening…Graham.

"TODAY! YOU BOYS BECOME MEN! TODAY WILL BE YOUR LEGACY TODAY—" Graham's epic speech was suddenly cut off. A sharp kick to the rear sent Graham rolling down the ramp into a tangled mess at the bottom.

"Yeah, yeah, move it you masked phantom or we'll never get our shopping done," said Lockon in a very annoyed manner.

Graham opened his mouth as to say, _no one interrupts my speeches_, but then thought better of it. He got up, brushed himself off and walked off in a huff.

"Ah ah," sighed Billy. "You just sent the most directionally challenged Flag fighter into the middle of a mall…without a map."

"What do you mean DIRECTIONALLY CHALLENGED!!!" screamed an engraged Graham from a hundred feet away. "I'll show you I'm not directionally challenged!" He promptly ran into the mall without any restraints.

"Well, as always, his hearing is impeccable." Billy covered his face with his hand as he shook his head in disapproval. "Hey Allelujah, are you ready to go?"

"In a moment, I just… have… to… drag… these idiots… out!" Allelujah appeared with on hand on Tieria's collar and one hand on Setsuna's collar. They two had managed to fall asleep and were trying very hard NOT to wake up. It didn't work…

"Mileina's going out with another guy," whispered Lockon in the ear or the purple haired Innovade.

Suddenly, Tieria's eyes snapped open glowing golden. "WHO IS SHE GOING OUT WITH!!! RAWR IF HE ISNT WORTHY BY MY JUDGEMENT THEN I WILL KILL HIM!!!"

Lockon quickly backed away from Tieria's flailing arms. "Calm down there buddy, I just said it to wake you up.

Tieria's arms stopped their violent rotation. "Wha? That was mean…" he sighed. "Well now that I'm up I guess I should wake up Setsuna. He leaned down and whispered in Setsuna's ear, "Your Gundam—"

Before he could finish Setsuna's eyes also snapped open glowing. His eyes darted about as he tried to locate Gundam. "Gundam? Where?"

"Nowhere Setsuna, now let's go, you want to impress Feldt right?" sneered Tieria.

Setsuna turned red, "I…no…it's just… You know what? It's better than you having a thing Mileina. What are you? 21 and she's only like 15."

Tieria froze and turned red as he blushed furiously. "Why you… that's unfair. And for your information my age is of no concern for this matter." He started to march towards Setsuna but was stopped by Lockon. Allelujah stopped Setsuna.

"Alright, calm down you two, we woke you up so we could go buy our gear," said Allelujah.

"Oh," said Setsuna and Tieria simultaneously. They mentally issued a temporary cease fire as they were marched over to the mall's entrance.

As they walked into the mall Setsuna felt a very strong chill run down (or is it up) his spine. Someone was watching him. He turned around and looked around but didn't spot anyone particularly suspicious. Shrugging he whirled around and walked away with the rest of the men… minus Graham.

A slim figure ducked behind the front end of a large SSUV (solar sports utility vehicle). She cracked an evil and mysterious smile as she began to plot ways to separate Setsuna from the rest of the man-pack. The red haired girl cackled maliciously but quickly went quiet as several pairs of curious eyes turned to the girl. The girl reached into her sports car and drew out a long but stylish Prada overcoat. She slipped the coat over her white and gold skin tight garments and switched her white boots for a pair of pumps.

"Be prepared Setsuna, the man of my first kiss… for I will have you… and you WILL BE MINE! AHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!

Okay…yeah…I don't know how this chapter really went. Sometimes I feel as if I'm taking too long with this pre-shopping mall arc.

Bamm thank you for your comments, they have significantly allowed for an increased level of insanity in the future chapters. (Though I apologize for not being much of a fan of the S2 Neena (a little too creepy for my taste), S1 Neena was much better ^__^ but that's just me)

As always RRF (Read, Review, Flame for those unfamiliar with my terminology). I hope you guys thoroughly enjoy this chapter. Remember guys (and girls) suggestions for further story madness is welcome and probably appreciated. Name pairings, events, and even stupidity that you may want me to incorporate. No guarantees that they WILL get incorporated, but if they do, you will get proper credit. (And if multiples have the same or very similar requests I'll mention as many as I can find (or remember).

I really don't know if I can keep this one chapter a night pace going, please don't eat me alive (that would be messy and unpleasant) because of that.


	5. Stalkers n Swimsuits n Fire Oh My

Hmmm…these chapters looked a lot longer in Microsoft Word…

Note to self…watch 00 again for more research…besides its still summer I can do it ^__^.

**Disclaimer**: I don't know if I have done this yet…but I don't own Gundam 00 or any part of the Gundam Franchise (if I did then my life would be complete and I would drool…XD)

**Chapter 5**

"You know what?" said Billy, "I think I'll go look for Graham before he does something rash…again."

"Yeah, go ahead, we'll meet up with you later," said Allelujah.

Billy split off from the group hoping that wherever Graham was it would not already be in shambles. During the conflict against Celestial Being, Graham had been the pilot, second to Patrick Colassaur, that had trashed the most military equipment. Luckily for Graham, or rather his sadistic alter-ego Mr. Bushido, all of the expenses had been filed under "Special Enforcement A-Laws", which literally meant that Graham had gotten off scot-free from any excessive billings. Billy sped up his pace of walking. Suddenly he heard a voice call out to him.

"Oy! Billy! Look what I found!" It was Graham. Next to him lay several large bags.

"What did you… oh my god…," Billy's eyes widened in shock and horror. _We are so dead…_ he thought

Meanwhile…

An unnatural chill ran up Setsuna's spine. Intuitively he knew that he was being followed, but he just couldn't locate the pursuer. As he walked with the other meisters he made several whirls to try and capture the slightest hint of his follower. These whirls did not go unnoticed.

"um… Setsuna?" asked Allelujah looking slightly concerned. "What are you doing?

"Yea what ARE YOU DOING?" asked Hallelujah harshly. Then he added, "Oh I know, he's seeing if anyone is checking him out. Well reality check Mr. InnovatedGundam. NO ONE KNOWS WHO YOU ARE!!!" The sarcasm was nearly tangible.

"Shut up Halle," retorted Allelujah as he took over his body again. "So, what are you doing?"

"We would like to know that too," said Lockon and Tieria simultaneously. Their eyes narrowed in suspicion as they stared at the meister.

Setsuna moved closer to the glaring meisters. "I think someone is following me."

"What?" said Lockon incredulously. "I don't think that's even possible seeing as how secretive we always do things, it has to be your imagination."

"It is possible that someone you know just spotted you as we entered the mall." Tieria pushed his glasses up his nose. Maybe it's a secret admirer. His glasses flashed evilly.

Setsuna went slightly red, "I have no such thing."

Without warning something tackled Setsuna, thankfully the force of the tackle was not enough to bring him to the floor. Setsuna felt the same chill run up his spine as shockingly red hair arced over his shoulder and a pair of breasts pressured his back.

"Gotcha!" It was a strangely familiar voice. But before the voice could continue Lockon, Allelujah, and Tieria all grabbed an unoccupied limb and tugged…hard.

They made a run for the nearest bathroom not daring to look back. With poor Setsuna being dragged helplessly on the floor he could only look backwards. The woman chasing them happened to be Nena Trinity, a pilot of the Gundam Throne Drei. The blood in his face drained. He was being pursued by one of the most psychotic and potentially destructive girls on the face of the planet. Thankfully he soon lost sight of Nena as they rounded a corner.

The other meisters were breathing hard. Lockon had no true idea as to why he suddenly felt compelled to drag Setsuna away. Allelujah and Tieria on the otherhand knew full well why they should keep the two apart.

"Man, who was that girl Setsuna?" asked the befuddled Irish meister. "She seemed pretty intent on catching you."

Setsuna opened his eyes and quickly leapt from the ground as he realized he was deep in the men's bathroom. "That…was Nena Trinity. She's been a little unstable since she lost her two brothers to Ali-Al-Sarchez. And now she seems to have developed a dangerous crush on me. I can't believe it took 5 years to manifest itself." Setsuna rubbed his temples as to try and rid himself of a large headache.

Taking a glance outside the men's bathroom Allelujah said, "I think it's safe to leave." He looked back at Setsuna who had not stopped rubbing his temples. "Unless Setsuna doesn't want to."

"No Allelujah, it's not that I don't want to…it's just that every time I see that girl something bad happens to me." He mumbled indistinctly, "My…rst…ss."

"What was that?" asked Allelujah.

"M…fir…iss." Mumbled Setsuna as his face flushed red.

"He mean's his first kiss Allelujah." Sighed Tieria. He now remembered why Setsuna had an odd fear of that girl. It was almost 6 years ago that the two had met on board the first Celestial Being mothership. The girl, Nena Trinity, had upon first glance chosen Setsuna and planted a huge kiss on the Meister's lips. Setsuna had roughly pushed her aside. Most of the crew saw the event but never mentioned it as Setsuna seemed to grow darker each time the Trinitys were mentioned.

"So…enough of the awkward silence… When do we get out of here?" asked Lockon. "We still have to buy out gear.

Setsuna had retreated into a sort of rocking fetal position. "I'm not getting out of here until that THING is gone."

"She should have lost track of us by now." Allelujah said casually.

"No. She's much more persistent than that." Setsuna was speaking into his knees.

Lockon got impatient. "Oy, if you are going to—" He was cut off suddenly as a booted leg came crashing down inches from Setsuna's toes.

"OY, CHIBI! I TOLD you not to screw things up right? RIGHT?!" Hallelujah was back in his all righteous fury. He picked up the moping Meister and shook him viciously. "If you don't get a move on then I'll just throw you to that girl." Venom dripped from every syllable of his words. Succumbing to the super soldier's wrath Setsuna finally gave up, at least temporarily.

Allelujah took a quick peek out the men's bathroom and when he didn't notice any red haired psycho stalkers he signaled Setsuna and they all left. With the Mission Impossible theme song playing endlessly in his mind, Setsuna kept turning his head every which way. His paranoid behavior was abruptly stopped by Tieria. The purple haired Innovade stared into his eyes with his piercingly violet ones.

"Setsuna, you have to stop looking around. You'll get spotted if you keep doing that." Said Tieria with all the seriousness his eyes could muster.

"But she might sneak up behind me…" Setsuna shivered at the thought of it happening again. He also thought of Feldt and how seeing her would bring him back to reality. After all, she was his anchor.

Back to Graham and Billy…

Billy rushed up the escalator to Graham's floor. He grabbed the pilot by the shirt and shook him a few times.

"What the HELL are you thinking buying those things?" Billy looked at the numerous bags surrounding Graham. Each bag was filled to the brim with an assortment of large and very colorful fireworks.

"No beach vacation is complete without a good dosage of fireworks!" Graham defended himself.

"I have to agree, but this is OVERKILL!" wailed Billy. "You have enough gunpowder here to fight a small war!"

Graham sighed as he patted Billy's shoulder. "My friend, my friend…the war is never over. My heart has been conquered by the desire to duel Gundam once again." Graham balled his right hand into a fist and shook it at the heavens. His eyes glittered meanacingly.

Billy, knowing his friend very well, simply gave up. He knew that when Graham was obsessed it was best to just let go and try and help him in whatever way he could. At the very least he could keep the fireworks from backfiring on Graham.

"Graham…you spent all of your money on fireworks didn't you?" asked Billy.

"What? Oh yeah, that's right. Wait…no. I still have a little bit of money. I simply bought out the stock of a small fireworks store just down the corridor." said Graham rather happily.

"But now you don't have enough money for a swimsuit," stated Billy. "And you need a swimsuit for the beach."

"Swimsuit? No…a MAN has no need for a swimsuit!" declared Graham. This got him a sharp smack in the back of the head.

"I'll kill you if you don't go buy a swimsuit!" Billy's eyes shone with determination.

Realizing that his friend was not going to let up Graham summoned a bellhop from a nearby hotel. Handing him a large bill, Graham instructed the boy to cart his numerous bags of fireworks out to the largest vehicle and hide them. The boy stared at the bill hungrily as he pushed an obscene amount of recreational explosives towards the parking building.

"There, now we can go unencumbered."

Billy grinned. He quickly marched Graham into the nearest male swimwear store. He forced Graham into a changing room and began rapidly picking out the latest fashions from the racks. He threw the various swimsuits over the door and instructed Graham to change into the one he liked best. Graham did not give in very easily. He had trouble deciding whether or not he should go in a nice pair of red and black board shorts or if he should go with an orange and white Speedo with a matching wetsuit.

After several minutes of vicious debate with himself, for most of which Billy was shaking his head, Graham decided. He walked out of the changing room fully clothed.

"Wait…weren't you going to buy something?" said Billy suspiciously.

"Of course! I decided, but even YOU don't get to see." Grinned Graham mischeviously.

"Dear God…not again…" Resigning himself to fate, Billy and Graham paid for their purchases and left the shop. "We should probably go find the others." Billy pulled out a small pocket computer and booted up the trace program. A small green blip pinpointed Setsuna's location, and where Setsuna was, the other Meisters were bound to be nearby. "Let's go."

Back to Setsuna and co.

Having been forced into a changing room in a men's swimwear outlet, Setsuna could do nothing except for look at his own reflection in the large mirror. Suddenly a pair of blue and white swim trunks arced over the divider. Tieria, being a master of styles and fashions, was busily picking out swimsuits that would match them all. As Setsuna began to undress he suddenly heard a scream of horror.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!!!" It was Hallelujah. "NO I'M NOT WEARING THIS TIERIA!!! NO WAY IN HELL! WAIT…WHAT? NO GET OUT OF MY STALL! AND STOP STRIPPING ME! FINE! I'LL DO IT MYSELF!"

The yelling stopped. Then a more calm voice drifted over the partition. "You know? It doesn't look that bad on you Hal." This time it was Allelujah.

"Shattup you fairie! I still have my pride you know?" Hallelujah's voice was supersaturated in anger. "Why the hell do I have to wear this? I should get equal say in what I want to wear!"

"Sigh…Hal, just look to your left. Is that okay? It did come in a set afterall."

"What? Humph…fine I'll wear that!" growled Hallelujah.

"Hey, look on the bright side!"

"What bright side?

"They'll be able to tell us apart."

"O whoopee…" Sarcasm almost flooded the changing room.

Shaking his head, Setsuna went back to undressing. He removed all of his clothes and tried on the shorts that Tieria had picked out for him.

"Not bad…not bad at all…" Setsuna muttered as he checked out the fit in the mirror. The suit perfectly fit on his slim figure. It accentuated the darkness of his skin a little but that was to be expected. He heard a sudden scraping and noticed in the corner that a hole was being drilled. Dread filled his body as he quickly grabbed his garments and positioned himself under the hole as to not be spotted. Being so close to the hole he heard the voices within.

"Damn, he's not there. Unlucky…"

It was a familiar voice and one that brought more chills down his spine. When he could no longer hear the breathing coming from the hole he got up and quickly redressed himself and got out of the stall as quickly as possible.

Outside the dressing rooms Tieria was about to have a fit. He simply couldn't find the swimsuit that was right for himself and for Lockon. Suddenly he noticed that Lockon walked right behind him and began to pick out a swimsuit for himself.

"What are you doing Lockon?" whispered Tieria as he got closer. "I thought we agreed that I would be the one to choose the swimsuits?"

"Well, you're taking too long and we're running out of time. By my watch, if we don't finish up and leave in the next 30 minutes then the sun will go down." Said Lockon rather gruffly.

"But…wait…" Tieria glanced down at his own watch. "SHIT! Gotta move fast, gotta move fast!"

Tieria began racing around the store at a speed that a normal human would not be able to match. Thankfully he did not cause any true disturbances, just a lot of windy moments. With Tieria distracted, Lockon went back to the careful selection of his swimsuit. He decided on getting a Green and white pair of board shorts and a green and black wet suit. He marched off to the counter and placed his items on the glass. He looked back and saw the purple blur continue to race around for a few more seconds.

"Um, sir?" the cashier asked nervously, "what are you looking at?"

Lockon did an internal head smack. He had forgotten that normal human beings could not see the blur that was Tieria.

"Nothing." He said quickly. "I would like to purchase these items."

"Of course, that will be 75 dollars and 62 cents."

"That's fine…do you take credit?" said Lockon whipping out a clear blue plastic card.

"Of course, just wave the card over the sensor." Lockon did as he was instructed and a digital receipt appeared above the glass. "Sign here please."

Lockon took the pen and scribbled _Lyle Dylandy_ into the provided space digital box.

"Thank you for your purchase. Have a nice day." The cashier smiled cheerily.

"Thanks. You too." Lockon returned the smile. He turned to Tieria who was still in the middle of deciding between two and said, "your turn."

Tieria jumped at suddenly having his little microcosm dilemma interrupted. He quickly looked at the cashier and then behind him. In his indecision he had accidentally held up a large number of other shoppers. He rushed forward and put both swimsuits on the counter.

"I'll take both of these," said Tieria. "Oh and I'll also take that pair of sunglasses," pointing at pair resting on a rotating display device.

"Very well sir, your total will be… 243.69." The cashier did a double take at the receipt. At first she thought there was a mistake but then realized that the items were of the most recent styles.

"Is credit okay?" said Tieria nervously, "I don't have any cash on me."

"It's fine."

Tieria produced a clear indigo plastic card and waved it over the sensor. The light flashed red.

"Sir…you have exceeded the maximum on that card, please select a different card."

Tieria withdrew another plastic card from the depths of his wallet and swiped it again. Thankfully this time the light turned green.

"Alright sir, if you would just sign here in the provided space."

Tieria scribbled _Tieria Erde_ hastily and hurried off to join Lockon who was, along with Allelujah, trying to convince Hallelujah that Tieria would not molest him anymore.

Lockon pleaded with the resistant super soldier. "Come on Hallelujah, I promise that I won't let Tieria harass you. Besides you are like what, 5 six times stronger than him?"

Hallelujah responded gruffly. "No, I refuse to associate myself with that compucon (derived from computer and complex). Besides what he did to me was scarring."

Lockon looked at Tieria with doubting eyes. Tieria acted as if nothing had happened. Lockon shook his head sending his wavy auburn hair tumbling. "Okay what happened Hallelujah?"

"He…he…he…touched my pants…"

Lockon nearly collapsed. "He touched your PANTS!!! THAT'S IT!!! I freaking brush into you every time you walk too close and you freak out cause Tieria touches your PANTS!!! I MEAN WHAT KIND OF SUPER SOLDIER ARE YOU!!!?"

There was no response. Then suddenly a calmer voice spoke. "He's right Hal, you can't hide from reality forever you know, you need to face that fear and take it by the throat…though not Tieria's throat as he would probably break." There was silence again, shortly followed by Hallelujah speaking.

"Tieria, if anything like that happens again…I will rain fire down upon your world like none other… Tieria…Tieria? Are you even listening?"

"He's listening." Lockon covered for Tieria who had mysteriously vanished.

Hallelujah opened the door cautiously and Allelujah walked out of the fitting room. "So…Lockon," do you have any idea where Setsuna is?"

Suddenly Tieria marched back with Setsuna in tow. In Setsuna's hand was the bag of swimwear and another bag, this one contained a colorful box. The four meisters left the men's swim apparel shop and headed towards the exit. On their way there they ran into Graham and Billy who also had their gear purchased. Together they walked back to the parking structure and up to the top floor where their shuttle was parked. The hatch hissed open and they all got in. Billy took the helm again before Hallelujah could even protest and started up the engines. The shuttle drifted upwards and took off. This time everything was more or less perfect. All the guys were exhausted from the day's drama and shopping antics. The only one who was still perfectly alert was Graham. He was anxiously opening compartments and looking for something.

"Where are they?...Where are they?"

Hi guys, sorry for the slow update. To make up for it I decided to write a longer chapter. If you haven't noticed already this chapter was devoted to the antics of the guys. The next chapter will be solely devoted to the girl's shopping drama.

Unfortunately I am going back to Taiwan for the rest of the summer so, while I will have my computer, I don't know if I will have readily available internet to use. Hopefully I will be able to upload something in about a week. I decided to somewhat stretch out my writing so as to do more research on the characters of 00.

So as always RRF (Read Review Flame) and toss your own ideas into the reviews. Until next chapter girls (and guys). ((HA!!! I REMEMBERED TO PUT GIRLS FIRST THIS TIME!!!))


	6. Apologies on the Extended Hiatus

Just a note to my dear readers,

Thank you kindly for having read the first six chapters of my fanfiction. As you may have noticed, for the last two years I have not updated. This is primarily because I lacked the inspiration to continue. It is also because I was awaiting the release of the Gundam 00 movie to continue the fanfiction. As of right now I believe that my writing the fanfiction cannot continue and reflect the characters accurately so I am hence forth terminating this fanfiction to reevaluate and reedit the entire thing. I hope that you will remain loyal fans as I come out with a new updated version that will hopefully have as many quirks and factors that you all enjoyed so much. I apologize for the long wait for this note. But FEAR NOT! As the great govenator of California once said in Terminator 2… "I'LL BE BACK!" *thumbs up*

P.S. The current edition of the fanfiction will remain on the website until I have substantial material to upload once again. Look forward to the new edition of Sand, Sun, and a Whole Bucket of Madness!

P.S.S. or is it P.P.S. Whatever. This new version of the fanfic will have a better explanation as to the nature of characters, i.e. Anew, Nina/Mena (I think that's what her name was in the movie), Graham, and a few other characters. I intend to have this fanfiction cover quite a number of romantic plotlines so there may be one or two original characters… just fyi…

Current relationships

Setsuna/ Feldt

Lockon 2/ Anew

Hallelujah Allelujah/ Soma Marie (technically two different relationships, will elaborate)

Tieria/ Mileina

Saji/Louise

Patrick/ Cati (dunno if that's how her name is spelled...)

Relationships in consideration…

Sumeragi

Billy

Graham

Nina/Mena

People not showing up

That psycho asian chick… too weird and not enough material on her

The ninja asian guy… never talked much… not enough material

Lockon… I can't explain away EVERY death… he might show up as a guest somewhere… it would be easier if this were a manga cause then I could sketch him in somewhere discrete.

The 'evil' innovades…

The ELS… well since I don't know much about these guys except they make an interesting harmonic fork noise I won't put in much about them unless I can create a decent backstory…

Oh… third and hopefully final update. I completely forgot that Nena had died in the second season… She may or may not come back… I don't know if I want to keep the psycho girl… might be good for setsuna to have an alternate love interest thingy.


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